Tales from DC: Morning Conversation

So the other morning, I was having my breakfast (newspaper, Raisin Bran, coffee -- in that order left-to-right) when I received a call from my boss.
I looked at the time. 7:45 a.m.?

Boss: Greg, I have potentially the strangest request you've ever received from your boss.

Greg: (pause) I'm going to wear underwear today. I don't care what you say.

Boss: You're CLOSE! You're so unbelievably close!

Greg: I...am?

Boss: I bought some new stone-washed jeans from amazon.com. I was driving into work, felt a draft, and when I looked down they had RIPPED OPEN. And it's in a strategically inappropriate place.

Greg: Oh.

Boss: My wife is too far away to get me pants before our morning meeting. I know there's that new shopping mall near your house--

Greg: You want me to buy you pants?

(Greg pulls phone away from mouth to laugh aloud)

Boss: I wear 40 x 32's in a LOOSE FIT. I don't like them too tight.

(Uncomfortable mental image)

Greg: Should I bill this to work?

Boss: I think it would be hard to sell this as a work expense.

Greg: You'll have trouble giving lectures without pants. It's one of those expected necessities in the classroom nowadays.

Boss: True...But why don't I just pay you back?